Crazy Cat Lady - Life with mulitple pets

Life as a companion to multiple pets can be rewarding. It can also be challenging, expensive and exhausting, especially as they age.

In the beginning I had only one. A year later it was two. My first husband rescued two more at different times and we lived happily with four kitties for years. Then my husband died. At that point the cats became the focus of my home life. Not because I was pathetic, but because they were my family. They were a connection to the man I had lost. They were my reason to get out of bed in the morning. And they carried me through the years of grief until I met my wonderful second husband. In fact, the day he and I set the date to get married, the last of the original four died - the first one we'd gotten, the Siamese that was my fur soul mate. Coincidence? I think not. I think he knew I was settled once again after being widowed and he could finally rest.

At any rate, my new hubby is also an animal lover and together we have a Yours, Mine and Ours situation. What should I have done? Made him get rid of some of his pets? Why would I do that? First of all, I'm an animal lover, so that was never an option. Second, I wasn't about to get rid of any of mine so why should he? Finally, one of the things about him that I found the most attractive was that he was also an animal lover.

Now, I love each and every one of them, but they are all aging now and their care has become more of a burden than I ever imagined - an epileptic dog, a senile 20-year old cat that cries pitifully at walls all day and night, another with chronic colon issues, a cat that gets respiratory infections every three months, a cat that required a $4000 surgery after a urinary tract blockage and is now on a special diet, another cat with terrible gum disease that we are having difficulty managing ... the list goes on.

The reason I am pointing these things out is that there are several situations that I (and probably many, many other multiple pet companions) would like to address:

Yes, they are my family. Telling me to simply get rid of them when the going gets tough is not an option. Don't suggest it. It makes my want to stick a fork in your eye.

No, I don't want to adopt the stray you found. Please understand that I am doing all that I can for the pets I have. It would not be responsible for me to take on another and you trying to guilt me into taking care of your situation is unfair. What about you? You don't have any pets. I'm doing my part, can you say the same?

Don't invite me to your home and then offer me your cat because you just had a baby and you don't want the kitty anymore. You would be surprised how many times this happens and it really pisses me off. Am I supposed to think that you are a great parent when you do that? Quite the contrary, if you can't keep a fifteen-year commitment to a cat, what are you going to do when your kid gets in trouble ... or gets sick or the going gets tough? Parenting is about responsibility, not abandonment. (Note that I am NOT talking about when a child has allergies, just when the parents don't want to be bothered anymore.)

Similarly, that puppy you got when you first got married has grown into a dog (not sure why this surprised you). I really don't want to hear about how you don't want him anymore because he's too much work. That is the same dog that would gladly lay his life down for you, your spouse and your children. In fact, I don't think you're worthy of him ... but he's a dog and he does. In fact, you are his life. If you spent as much time trying to earn that honor as you do complaining about him, you'd see how much he enriches your life.

Don't give me a hard time when I say I need to leave an event to feed my pets/let the dogs out (Yeah, it was me)/give the dog her epilepsy medicine/etc. As I've said, they are my family. Not only is it heartbreaking to see my dog having a seizure, it's potentially dangerous. Last year, she had a cluster episode that she couldn't come out of and required a two-day stay in the ICU. I will not remember your party fondly if I return home to find my furbaby dead.

I am of the firm opinion that the cats are the cause of crazy cat lady syndrome, not the result. You love them so you get a lot (cat lady), realizing too late that they are destroying your sanity (crazy cat lady)! Even though having this many animals is driving me batty, I still love them and will honor the commitment I made to them when I agreed to love them and care for them just as I did for my first husband when he was ill. I will never have this many again, but I will not turn my back on those I have. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to live with myself in the future.